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Tuesday, 19 May 2015

Wakora iki igihe umugabo wawe aguciye inyuma?

Umaze igihe ubana n’umugabo wawe ariko uhora umukeka ko yaba aguca inyuma bitewe n’imyitwarire idasanzwe umubonana. Biranashoboka ko waba waramufatiye muri icyo gikorwa ariko ukaba wibaza uko wabyifatamo, niba mwatandukana cyangwa se niba hari icyo wakora ngo umubano wanyu usubire uko wahoze.
Ikibazo cyo gucana inyuma hagati y’abashakanye kiri muri bimwe bigora uwaciwe inyuma kwihanganira. Nubwo ariko atari ikibazo buri mugore waciwe inyuma n’umugabo we atapfa kwigobotoramo, hari inama urubuga love intelligence
rutanga z’uko umugore wahuye n’iki kibazo yabyitwaramo.
1.Kudahita ubishyira ku karubanda
Niba warafashe umugabo wawe aguca inyuma , guhita ubishyira ku karubanda ni ikosa. Icya mbere uba umennye ibanga ubundi ryari iry’urugo ikindi biba bigoye ko wabasha kwiyunga no kongera kubana n’umugabo wawe amahoro , uzi impamvu? Ni uko unabigerageje amagambo yabantu yazatuma uhindura icyemezo cyawe.
2.Wihita ufata umwanzuro wo kwihorera
Muri kamere ya muntu , iyo uhemukiwe, kwihimura no kwihorera nibyo bihita biza mbere mu ntekerezo. Uretse no kuba gusambana n’umuntu utazi uko ubuzima bwe buhagaze wahakura imbwa yiruka, byanatuma nta tandukaniro ugaragaje hagati yawe n’umugabo wawe waguciye inyuma. Ahubwo byatuma ahita abona ko ntakosa yakoze kuko mwese muri bamwe, ntacyo umurushije.
3.Fata umwanya uhagije wo gutekereza
Tubonye ko guhita uhubuka umushyira ku karubanda atari byiza na busa, ko ndetse guhita wihorera waba uzambije ibintu. Igikurikiraho ni ukwiha umwanya uhagije wo kwiherera ugatekereza kukibazo cyabaye hagati yanyu. Kuba umuhunze igihe runaka ukajya ahantu hitaruye bibarinda kuba mwagirana ubushyamirane bwavamo no gukomeretsanya.
Mu gutekereza , uzareba niba ntaruhare ruziguye cyangwa rutaziguye rwamuteye kuguca inyuma. Niba ibyo wasabwaga byose warabikoze, ukaba witwara neza kuburyo bwose bushoboka mu rugo, cyane ku ngingo yo gutera akabariro, biramahire. Ariko niba ubona hari uruhare wabigizemo nabwo ntibyakubuza gukomeza intambwe ikurikiyeho.
4.Ikiganiro
Niba waragenzuye ukabura impamvu yamuteye kuguca inyuma, igikurikiraho ni ikiganiro. Musabe umwanya mujye ahantu hihereye nkuko mwajya mubigenza ibintu bitarazamba. Hanyuma mu buryo no mu ijwi rituje, mubaze icyamuteye kuguca inyuma, icyo yakuburanye yagiye gushaka ahandi. Abagabo ni abana beza, nuca bugufi azakubwira icyabimuteye . Bityo uzabasha kumenya niba hari uruhare ubifitemo cyangwa ntarwo. Nubwo atari ingeso yahoranye ariko abagabo bagenzi be nabo bashobora kuba barayimwanduje.
Nyuma y’ikiganiro nibwo uzabona n’uko umubabarira. Kubabarira ni irangamuntu iranga abantu bose bakundana. Nutabasha kumubabarira ngo murebe imbere hazaza, umubano wanyu uzaba ushingiye ku buryarya.
Kongera kubaka umubano
Niba uhisemo ko mwakomeza kubana kubera impamvu z’abana mwabyaranye, inzozi mufite z’ahazaza, byinshi muhuriyeho, urukundo umukunda n’ubwo yaguciye inyuma,..ukwiriye:
5.Mube hafi
Guhunga urugo ntacyo byakugezaho. Guhunga ikibazo siwo muti wacyo. Ugomba kuba mu rugo rwawe ukongera imbaraga aho yakubwiye bipfira mu kiganiro mwagiranye, kandi ukarushaho kumwereka urukundo no kumuba hafi . Bizamurinda kongera gukebaguza.
6.Mwubakire ku byiza
Nubwo yaguhemukiye ariko ntago ibyo akora byose ari amakosa. Ubu mugiye gutangira kuri zeru. Ibibafitiye inyungu nibyo mugomba guha umwanya. Mwubake ubumwe kurusha uko byahoze. Ahanini umugabo ajya guca umugore inyuma kuko nta bumwe bubatse, ibihe bimurinda kwifuza abandi bagore,..
7.Iyubakemo icyizere
Kuba yaraguciye inyuma . icyizere wamugiriraga cyarangiritse. Ugiye kucyubaka bushyashya. Ibuka ko nta cyizere kiri hagati yanyu , umubano wanyu waba wubatse kumusenyi, nta shingiro waba ufite. Irinde kumucyurira kuko ikosa yararyemeye ndetse abigusabira imbabazi agusezeranya ko atazabyongera.
8.Muhate urukundo
Impamvu nyamukuru yo gucana inyuma kw’abashakanye(iyo atari ingeso) biterwa no kugabanuka ko kwitanaho, guterana umugongo mu gihe cy’imibonano mpuzabitsina, ingeso mbi ziranga abagore bamwe na bamwe,..
Iki nicyo gihe cyo kumwereka urukundo utigeze umugaragariza. Nicyo gihe cyiza cyo kongera imbaraga aho wadohotse. Ongera wiyiteho, abagabo bakunda umugore usa neza ufite isuku. Mureshye wituma abakowa bakiri bato bamugutwara kandi ntacyo bakurusha uretse kwiyitaho. Itange mu gihe cy’akabariro niba wari usanzwe uri umunebwe.
Nubwo bitoroshye kubabarira no kongera kubaka umubano igihe umugabo wawe yaguciye inyuma ariko birashoboka. Abagushuka guhita usenya bime amatwi. Hari ingo nyinshi zibanye neza kandi barigeze guhura n’iki kibazo ariko kuba barabashije kukigobotoramo neza bikaba bitumye babanye mu mahoro.
Nubwo kandi mwatandukana hari igihe undi washaka yajya aguca imbere aho kuguca inyuma. Ikindi ntugomba kwireba ubwawe ngo wirengagize ahazaza habana banyu n’uburere bwabo igihe muzaba mumaze gutandukana.
Ibitekerezo , inyunganizi kuri iyi nkuru turabyakira, shyira igitekerezo cyawe ahabugenewe. Kugisha inama kuri uru rubuga, ohereza ikibazo cyawe kuri tricksconnect@gmail.com

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